GoldWing World
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GoldWing World
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My wife and I created "Why Harley and Gold wing riders don't wave back" top ten list back in early 1997 and shared it with our friends. A few months later (in April) we sent it out to a couple of lists and almost immediately started seeing it (un-credited) on bulletin boards across the world. Some people would be upset, but I see it as simply a sign that people enjoyed our humor, wanted to share it and didn't have the sense not to cut the last two lines that credited the source. Here is an early message I kept when I started seeing it copied in case you don't believe this classic was created by my wife and I:
-----Original Message----- Subject: Top Reasons Harley Riders Don't Wave Back My wife and I have noticed on our Goldwing Trips that when we wave at other bikers we ALMOST always get waved back at. Unless the bike is a Harley, a crotch rocket, or very occasionally a fellow winger. We began to wonder why this might be and came up with the following (intended to be humorous) possibilities: NOTE: Reasons GOLDWING Riders don't wave back follows, and BMW's after that so don't think I'm bashing Harleys! 14 Afraid will invalidate Warranty. 13 Leather and Studs makes it too hard to raise arm 12 Refuses to wave at anyone whose bike is already paid for. 11 Loud exhaust vibrations have disabled brain's wave reflex. 10 Loss of aerodynamics would cause gas mileage to plummet from 5mpg to only 2. 9 Raising arm into wind would cause the Harley riders cigarette to go out. 8 Afraid to let go of handlebars because they might vibrate off. 7 Rushing wind would blow the scabs off the new tattoos. 6 Angry because they just took out second mortgage to pay luxury tax on new Harley 5 Just discovered fine print in the owners manual and realized Harley is partially owned by those "Rice Burner" manufacturers. 4 Can't tell if other riders are waving or just reaching up to cover their ears like everyone else. 3 Last time a Harley rider waved back, they impaled their hand on their spiked helmet. 2 Just spent the morning combing their underarm hair. And the #1 reason Harley riders don't wave back at Goldwings: Jealous that after spend over $30 thousand dollars they STILL don't own a Goldwing!!!
TOP 10 REASONS GOLDWINGERS DON'T WAVE BACK: 10 Wasn't sure if you were waving or blocking the light from his show lights. 9 Afraid he might get frostbite if he takes his hands off his heated grips 8 Arthritis and the past 400 miles have made it difficult to raise his arm 7 Reflection from his Tulsa windscreen blinded him momentarily 6 The expresso machine just finished 5 Has actually fallen asleep in his chair 4 Was in a three way conference call with his stock broker and mechanic 3 Couldn't find the "autowave back" button on the dashboard 2 Was adjusting the CD player's programmable tracks and the #1 reason Goldwing riders don't wave back: 1 They couldn't see you over the glare from the chromed dash accents!
(Ed note: The following is NOT written by us but was sent at the same time as this email with our creation) And here's the Top 10 Reasons why BMW riders never wave back, sent to me by someone who read the above: 10. Arm is too sore from counting out so much cash for a 2-cylinder bike whose design is older than George Burns.. 9. Mad because Honda copied their opposed-cylinder idea (they don't wave at Subaru's either). 8. Afraid it will be misinterpreted as a Nazi salute. 7. The wind might cause the brie to run out between their fingers. 6. They are keeping their weight on the handlebars so they can do a whole 50 miles on that seat. 5. It will look bad if the paparazzi snap a photo. 4. Can't risk possible injuries that would spoil their golf game. 3. Gucci riding suits are cut way too tight. 2. Think "BMW" stands for "Bad Men Wave". AND FINALLY: 1. You haven't been properly introduced. |